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Candice Lightner's Legacy
http://www.answers.com/topic/candy-lightner In addition to writing her book, Lightner continued to speak out against drunk driving in lectures across the country. In 1992, she founded a group called Victims in Action and its legislative arm, the Victims in Action Political Action Committee. In 1994, Lightner drew fire from MADD for lobbying on behalf of the American Beverage Institute, a trade group of restaurant and hotel executives. She took sides against her former allies over states wanting to pass laws lowering the blood alcohol level at which a driver is considered legally drunk from .10 to .08. Lowering the limit would not get the most dangerous drivers off the road, Lightner argued. Drivers with blood alcohol levels above .10, she asserted, cause more than 80 percent of drunk driving deaths. "The man who killed my daughter kept on driving drunk," Lightner told Katherine Griffin of Health magazine. "He has since been arrested several more times. In each case his blood alcohol content has been .20 or above. A small segment of our drinking/driving population causes the majority of the fatalities. So why aren't we going after them?"
http://ezinearticles.com/?DUI-and-MADD&id=740859 In the year 1985, just 5 years after founding the organization MADD, the founder Candy Lightner left the organization criticizing the group for becoming a “neo-prohibitionist” organization targeting alcohol rather than the problem of drunk driving. The new mission of MADD had grown into being an ever-increasing hard line stance against the consumption of alcohol regardless of whether or not it had anything to do with driving.
MADD Founder Candice LightnerGrassroots Activist Turns Personal Tragedy into National Movement. ![]() Candice Lightner says grieving is the beginning, middle and rest of her life. "My daughter Carrie was 13 and she was killed by a multiple repeat offender, (a) hit and run drunk driver. And that started the whole movement. I was so angry." That anger motivated the 34-year-old divorced mother of three to take a stand. She quit her job as a real estate agent and immersed herself into organizing a fight to save lives. In 1980, the year Carrie was killed by a drunk driver, 27,000 people died in alcohol-related crashes. Lightner called her new group Mothers Against Drunk Driving, also known by its acronym, MADD.
Lightner also fought to criminalize driving drunk. "My belief was [that] we needed to have judges and law enforcement and everybody else say that this behavior is not acceptable. It is not tolerable. We are going to do something about it. Then maybe the public would pick up on the fact that this is a crime and it is a serious crime." During Candice Lightner's first press conference in August 1980 launching MADD, her daughters Carrie and Serena's friends picket the State capitol in Sacramento MADD lobbied for tougher laws and harsher penalties and got them. For the five years between 1980 and 1985 that Lightner ran the organization, 500 new laws were passed across the country to address the drunk-driving issue. "I learned that you really can make a difference, that you really can change attitudes, you can change laws, you can become involved and immersed in something and have a positive impact."
When Lightner left MADD, she worked with struggling non-profits and picked up the pieces of her home life. "I get calls all the time from people who want to start a movement, who have had some tragedy that happened to them or a friend or whatever, and there are a number of groups… that exist that I helped in the beginning and that I was happy to do. And, I always tell them: 'It is really important that while you are doing this you still are able to take care of your family, really maintain your life.'"
Candice Lightner says over the years the pain of her daughter's death has lessened but that it never goes away. The impassioned activist against drunk driving and founder of MADD says, "It is a lot easier to deal with anger and rage than with heartache." Source: http://www.voanews.com
http://www.dui.com/dui-library/victims/personal-tragedy
Im her grand dauter!
Posted by Erica Lightner
at 2007-10-30 12:38
My name is Erica Lightner And Im candice lightner's
granddaughter. I love what she did and im so proud of
her . my dad(travis) told me the story of aunt carie and
i know the story.
Posted by Luc at
2007-11-29 09:17
Great work to Candice Lightener but your granddaughter
should really go to school to learn to spell...
Posted by Yh at
2007-12-06 08:36
The tirade Ms Lightner began back in the 80's has long
since spiralled out of control since her departure, and
despite the tragedy she endured; the amount of
unnecessary control she's exerted and lives ruined by
the punitive measures she helped initiate has outweighed
her pain. Period. Anyway you'd like to quantify it, her
daughter has been avenged, and now we have passed over
into victimization and prohibition.
An equivalent situation might be: I get diahrrea from a burrito I eat at a Taqueria, and right away begin an all out war on Immigration. Or a black man mugs me once, so I begin calling the police to report suspicious activities any time I see an African-Americann anywhere. An exaggeration? Hardly. Drinking is NOT illegal but has been criminalized to such a high degree that the only next step available is the complete erradication of alcohol altogether. I can only imagine how many spouses and children of convicted DUI offenders have had to suffer every day that their loved one remained a criminal. This includes- becoming flat broke from DUI fines, loss of employment due to suspended license. These methods of punishment have pushed many on the poverty line into homelessness, and yet, those that seem to care the least (actors, politicians, celebrities) seem to be punished the least as well. Their pocketbooks provide a thick shielding against the true financial drain a DUI can be.Can we really stand behind legislation that makes one mistake cause your whole life to fall apart with no chance of ever recovering? I'd love to see how many suicides are related to DUI convictions. There's a hard stat to come by. And yet they have the clairvoyance to assess hoe many accidents have been PREVENTED?? Right. Real convincing stats. My pops always said, Take responsibility or someone else will take it for you... Well what about when a group has stripped us of our rights, and not allowed us to prove responsibility, yet saddled us with all the liability in the world in order to remain in power. When will we stop the zealots from shifting our free society into a prison that they designed in order to make them(self appointed judge-jury-AND-executioner) feel secure? Maybe we won't feel the need to act until they've taken away all of our rights completely, but by then it will surely be far too late .
Posted by J Phillips at
2007-12-07 10:44
This comment is for YH who wrote the idiotic comment
above! YOu should be ashamed of yourself! You would not
feel that way if you had lost a loved one due to the
selfish act of a DUI driver. I was hit by a 6 time
repeat offender and nearly lost my life. I spent 2 years
in a hospital learning to do all the things that you
probably take for granted. I applaud the movement that
Candi Lightner started and I will do EVERYTHING in my
power to stop drunk driving. I do not, however, have
anything against alcohol, as long as it is consumed
responsibly. Maybe that is your underlying problem - you
do not know how to be responsible and do not like the
consequences. Too bad. People know the laws, if they
break them and hurt or kill someone, they should be
tried for attempted murder and murder. As angry as I am
at YOU for your stupidity I do not wish the pain and
suffering that I have been through at the hands of a
drunk driver. Not to mention that my 4 year old niece
was killed by yet another repeat DUI offender. Please
grow up.
Posted by don at
2008-03-03 21:02
drunk driving is one thing... criminalizing a million
people a year because of a personal vendetta because of
a person who caused you harm is another. Even the
founder of MADD, Candace Lightner (god bless her) stated
that the newer goals of MADD were neo-prohibitionist,
that the real problem lies at drivers at 0.15 and above,
and the system letting them go, not lower the BAC, etc.
I feel incredibly bad for your situation J Phillips, but
I would also like to know the BAC of these persons who
victimized you and your family. Would these incidents (I
am very careful not to use the word "accidents" here)
have happened if the driver was stone cold sober? Please
note, the number of "drunk" driving deaths are
declining, but the overall automobile deaths are
rising... see any disparagy here?
Posted by J Phillips at
2008-03-06 11:49
This comment is for Don posted above. I do not have a
personal vendetta against anyone. In fact I have
forgiven the man that hurt me. I know that he wasn't a
bad person, and that alcohol causes poor judgement.
However, I USED to work for MADD but left because I had
a different opinion on certain things. And I appreciate
you not calling them "accidents". However, laws are
laws. Anyone who breaks any of them should be punished!
And people know the risks of driving under the influence
and are gambling with theirs and other innocent people's
lives. Like playing Russian Roulette. Sometimes it might
end up without harm to anyone, and sometimes it could be
fatal. I believe education is the key, not the miracle
cure. The BAC of my crash was over a .10 and the one
that killed my niece was merely at the limit. And if
both of the drivers of my crash and my nieces had been
sober, they would not have been on the wrong side of the
road and hit us head on. Yes the number of DUI deaths is
declining and that is great but is it down enough if one
of those numbers is someone you love? Last year I was
hit by a driver high on meth doing over a 100mph! Its
not just alcohol we have to worry about.
Posted by don at
2008-03-06 20:29
Against the law means someone should automatically be
punished. With total disregard to that individual's
personal rights and civil liberties. If laws are such a
noble concept, why are they always being changed and/or
repealed? I could list all the downright silly to
absolutely heinous laws this country has had in the
past, but that would make this an incredibly long post.
Just because something is law does NOT make it right.
Laws are made by humans, humans are flawed and often
times driven more by emotion than common sense or logic.
Case in point, studies have shown that cell phone use is
more dangerous than drunk driving. Some states have
already taken action, and I applaud them for that, but
these same states do not take away that persons license
automatically, charge them insanely high court costs,
nearly ensure that person has to hire a lawyer and pay
high costs, face jail time and/or community service, an
alcohol interlock device (should cell phone
users/offenders have a disabler installed in their
vehicle?) public humiliation, loss of employment,
suicide for being treated so harshly, etc. And this can
all happen at the whim of a police officer. Even though
proven more dangerous than "drunk" driving, no "Candace
Lightner" has decided to start an organization to end
this activity that takes many lives every year, been
taken over by zealots over the years (anti technology
freaks) and escalated to making literally millions of
people criminals because of a vendetta. I believe the
highways should be made safer, but in an intelligent,
rational, and logical way; not based in emotion. I truly
empathize with what has happened to you, but I also
invite you to consider the fallout of punishing every
one for a few peoples mistakes. If you have not watched
them, I recommend the following movies as a warning to
where this country is steadily heading; Minority Report,
Judge Dredd (crappy movie, but pertinent), V for
Vendetta, Gattaca and Aeon Flux. I am certain there are
more, but if you have seen them, watch them again (hell,
I will send you the money to rent them if necessary) and
pay attention to what happens when liberties are eroded
from individuals. These movies are intentended as
entertainment of course, but they also hold a warning
for the future. I also invite you to check out some
links on my website that give further insight to what I
am talking about
http://www.webspawner.com/users/poelf/index.html. It is
a terrible occasion when someone incurs personal injury
or death due to someone elses irresponsibility, it is
also a terrible occasion when a responsible person is
punished due to someone elses irresponsibility.
Posted by Go F*c! Yourself
at 2008-08-19 04:22
I'd just like to comment on these posts. I've been a
victim of a driver/pedestrian "accident". The driver who
ran me over was totally stone sober. I spent 2 weeks in
the hospital in intensive care. Spent another 2 months
at home under "observation", and was only then allowed
to return to school. I'm also a victim of receiving a
DUI. An unfairly and unjust check point was established
which I was forced into. That's called entrapment boys
and girls. Anyway, the laws and fines associated with
DUIs are only in existence to create revenue for the
State. Period. There are more people killed in
"accidents" that do not involve alcohol than there are
that do involve alcohol. Check the web, there's all
kinds of stats you can look up about the "bad science"
MADD uses in order to convey their message. While you're
at it, look up the earning figures for the MADD
executives. And also remember it's a tax exempt
corporation. FREE MONEY!!!! One again the almighty
dollar making the world go 'round. One other point I
wanted to make was the law here in the glorious
Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, restricts COD (commercial
drivers license) drivers (think big rig drivers) from
renewing their license, ever again. Just after their
first offense. But the surgeon who may be cutting your
head or chest open gets a slap on the wrist. That's
somewhat ironic to me. I have to agree with Don as per
posted above. Go watch the movies he listed. It's a
sickening realization to the future this p.o.s. country
is heading for. I'm on the next boat outta here if you
ask me. And would someone please teach "Erica" how to
spell? Maybe some of the MADD money should be used
towards educating the youth of the nation. Instead of
being use to incriminate it. And lastly, remember the
only certainty in life is death (more irony). If you die
from an alcohol related "accident", it's probably better
than suffering the horror of cancer. Just a thought.
Posted by Jeremy at
2009-01-22 18:57
Am I reading this right? You have suddenly jumped ship
on the whole alcohol issue and now have brought illegal
drugs into the picture. Perfect and you said you didn't
mind responsible consumption. It really is hard to
believe your not pushing for the complete prohibition of
alcohol and even then do you think it is going to
prevent all alcohol related crashes? Hardly, now instead
of a peaceful drunk pulling over calmly, they are going
to be evading police and surely putting inocent lives in
danger. Whatever your agenda may be, I dont like it and
it is truely against every aspect are founders fought
for. But then again, I couldn't expect any of you to
know what freedom is.
Posted by Ash at
2009-05-29 04:32
For all that have been injured by drunk drivers, I get
it. The question is why is alcohol legal if it is such a
horrible thing. I sit in my DUI class listening to my
teacher tell me that she had a 30 year meth/speed habit
and she has gone 10 days without sleeping and driven a
car when she was imagining things coming at her, and she
wants ZERO TOLERANCE for people drinking. I drank from
18 til 43 moderately and never had a problem...Was I
over the limit, hell yes but that doesn't mean drunk.
This law is destroying lives and criminalizing millions
of people who have never committed a crime in their
life. When you suspend a person's liciese for a
year(even to go to work) you destroy families. After a
hard days work, going to a bar for pitcher has become
Russian roulette. Police officers are some of the
biggest drinkers but they have to go and enforce .08 for
everyone else and then sleep at night. This law and now
domestic violence laws have given lawyers the right to
make EASY MONEY for doing NOTHING but getting someone
the same plea deal they could have gotten without them.
If you take a DUI charge to a jury you could end up
doing 6 months to a year in prison. Here in California
with all the gangbangers in prison, that could be a
death sentence. Personally I think the cameras in the
police cars should be removed cause the cops have to do
a thankless job and they are being USED AS MUCH AS
ANYONE. It is all about money and destroying average
americans lives. If i wanted to have a couple of beers
and walk my dog, due to ZERO TOLERANCE I would be
looking at another DUI. MADD has destroyed more lives
then it could have saved and financially destroyed
people to the point where they might be drinking MORE
THEN EVER to deal with all the stress. I feel sorry for
the 21 year olds who want to hang out with their friends
on a weekend at a bar or nightclub in California, they
are truly screwed and DUI charges will destroy families
in the process. It is pathetic.
Posted by chris colbert
at 2008-11-16 00:50
you don't mention whether the driver who hit you was
drunk at the time or not. Or the driver that hit and
killed your niece. Assuming they were, however, isn't
this evidence that D.U.I. laws did nothing to prevent
your injuries and your niece's death? If lower and lower
BAC limits aren't preventing these tragedies, what is
their purpose?
Posted by Kit at
2009-09-13 10:09
Funny, no mention of how Candy's departure from the MADD
scene came about though her OWN DUI arrest !
Posted by al at
2009-06-28 08:22
what kind of hurtful person are you? is that the only
thing you have to say to that little girl. what if she
was very young when she wrote that? you are just what
this world doesn't need, more pain!!! how dare you? i
can just imagine this girls heart being hurt when she
read your comment. that the only thing you had to say
was that crap. you go around and break little kids
hearts much? i bet you do. you're evil.
Posted by J Phillips at
2008-03-06 12:01
Hello Erica! I would love to talk to you if you are
interested. You're grandmother Candi has been my
inspiration for the last 20 years. She is an incredible
person who has changed millions of lives, mine included.
MADD helped my mother back in 1983 when I was 16 and was
hit by a drunk driver. Please tell her that I am one of
her biggest fans. You can email me at stopDUI@gmail.com.
I hope to hear from you soon!
Posted by Becca Plate at
2008-11-03 10:56
Hey Erica!
My friends and I are working on a project for National History Day. We have decided to do your grandmother for our project. We would like to contact her in some way, but we just can not find anything. We live in Alexandria Virginia as well and we really need to get working on our project. Do you think you could maybe give us an address or email? We are doing a documentary, and would LOVE if we could get a short interview. If you would, pass this on to your grandmother that would be so wonderful. thanks a lot, Becca,Fatima and Michelle
Posted by Erica lightner
at 2008-11-03 19:05
yah, give me your email and ill give it to her to email
you back. my email is ericalightner@yahoo.com
Posted by becca plate at
2008-11-03 20:27
ok. my email is guitaramp101@gmail.com
thank you SOOO much!!
Posted by Tom Loed at
2008-11-04 10:08
Here's my concern. My girlfriend receieved a d.u.i.
after drinking about 10 oz of beer. We arrived to the
bar and almost immediately had to give a friend a ride
home because he had too much to drink and we didn't want
him driving. We were pulled over for a minor traffic
infraction and the police smelled alcohol in the car,
from our friend. They obviously questioned my girlfriend
and she told them then she drank about a 1/2 pint of
beer. She weighs about 100 pounds and blew a .08 and was
taken to jail. Because of this she lost her license for
6 months. During that time she had to quit college as
well as her job as they were both more then 20 minutes
away. Up to that point she had never been arrested and
was well upon her way to a successfull life. The d.u.i.
caused her to put her life on hold and it took her years
to be able to get back to a point which she could return
and finally finish college. I do believe that drinking
and driving can be a bad thing if you're actually drunk.
I also believe that reading, texting, talking, laughing,
joking, and generally not paying attention while driving
is also very dangerous. Only difference is people do not
have their lives ruined by the police and state for
g.o.w.d. or goofing off while driving. I believe that
the punishment should fit the crime. When a person goes
through a personal tradgedy they want to lash out and
blame others for their own situations. My girlfriend had
nothing to to with killing anyone's loved ones or
ruining lives. All she was doing was giving a friend a
ride who would have driven drunk had we not helped. This
country is growing so increasingly ridiculous in it's
judgement on both sides of the law. A person has two
beers and their life is ruined. I am sorry to families
who have lost loved ones, it's a tradgedy but it isn't
fair to inflict harm because harm has been inflicted
upon you. I think Candice Lightner is an angry person
and if it is true that she has had multiple d.u.i.'s
then she is a hipocrate as well.
Posted by Laurie Lewis
at 2009-01-19 01:43
To the Lightner family: First of all, God Bless All Of
You... without you and your experience with this tragic
situation, I don't know where I would have turned. I
lost my husband in 1989, due to a drunk driving
accident. He was the driver. He was 29 years old. I
became a single mother of three daughters within
seconds... they are all grown up now and of course
asking me questions...which I have tried to answer to
the best of my ability. Thank God for you!!!!! After a
few years, I found another man and we fell in love!! I
got pregnant in November of 1996 with twin boys. We were
head over heels in love and doing really well. In April
of 2000, he too lost his life in a drunk driving
accident. He was 31 years old. He was riding a bicycle
and crashed into a curb. WWWHHHOOOAAAA!!!!! What the
heck??? What happrned and why was I/we going through
this again? Why was I/we ever going through this ever??
I loved these two men with all of my heart and soul and
I felt then and still feel so alone without them. I look
at my children and know deep down inside that they carry
on their beauty, their handsomeness, their over-all
beings...Thank you so much for opening up your lives and
hearts to all of us out here that feel the same pain.
I'm so glad I have a place to speak, even though it's
been a while since I've spoken to anyone about our
losses...it feels better to just know that you are
here... GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY AND MAY YOU ALWAYS
CARRY LOVE AND HOPE IN YOUR HEARTS!!!!! LOVE TO YOUR
HEARTS FROM OURS, The Lewis Family
Posted by Bobby Bertoniere
at 2008-04-07 20:46
I know this site is going to support this MADD woman,
After serving in the military I just want to know when
your friend Candice Lightner plans to apologize about
her statements about the military this morning on The
Morning Show with Mike and Juliet, She said "They Are
Not Adults, that's why they're in the military."
As a veteran of a foreign war, while serving in Afghanistan at 19, I think I Deserve an apology. Also, I think the military deserves an apology too Candice. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHpAgVYlB0w
Posted by Charlene Gelb
at 2008-05-11 14:37
This is Erica's mother. Erica is only 11 years old and I
just found out that she posted this. I apologize that
she did not mention her age in her original post. I know
that her grandmother is a controversial figure and do
not wish to get in to any debates with anyone about it.
I will try to monitor her internet use more carefully in
the future. Meanwhile, I will post a clarification of
her age on here so that everyone who replies to her can
be aware that she is only 11 years old. Thank you.
Posted by Charlene Gelb
at 2008-05-11 14:51
Hello everyone! I am Erica Lightner's mother and she
just showed me the comment she posted here some time
ago. Unfortunately, she did not mention that she is only
11 years old. I understand that adults use this forum to
discuss various issues related to her grandmother and
drunk driving issues, but I would like to ask everyone
that replies to her to please remember that she is only
11 years old and keep that in mind when writing to her.
Thank you.
Posted by Rqoul Mendez
at 2008-06-28 20:05
No one I'm sure intends to traumatize a sweet young girl
such as Erica . But It must be ackcnowleged that Erica
too will grow into Adolesence --- Adulthood --- and will
be held to the same standards advocated by her parents
In the interem so many lives are being affected by the dubious and at times totally arbitrary misuse of power This situation is justified by ambiguous statistics tailored to reflect the opinions of a Zealous Few --- They use political pragmatism --- to Impose the Sacred Will of the few -- on the Many Victimless crimes are punished by Statutes -- forced into law by the Zealots who Carry the Cross of Rightousness to Washington and find their reason for existence in it's cause. Victimized or not Who threaten to use highway funding as a sword of Damaclese hanging over the heads of local government forcing ( comply ) And who of course could never imagine their Children at some future point being victimized by this same lack of REASON. Yes REASON!! My Heart felt condolences go out to Erica's Mom and all those who have fallen victim to DRUNK DRIVERS " What Zealot seeking Justice Ever Found it in the End When clouded in Extremity --- reason ends -- and people tend -- to Cast the First Stone "
Posted by Banjo at
2008-08-14 12:57
While this has appeared to be a great organization, the
rhetoric of this organization has turned into 'big
money' for every state. Do you actually think that the
states care how many people actually die on the road,
whether it be from drunk driving, people that are
half-blind, can't drive, speeding, etc.? And look how
many of our government officials are drinking and
driving and pedophiling and everything else. Nope, it's
how much money my particular state of Ohio can glean
from these people. Do you think every person that drinks
and uses bad judgement is a criminal? That's why it's
defined as bad judgement. And if a person is 'impaired'
to begin with, why would anyone allow a judicial system
to use that same 'impairment' against these very same
people? The very word itself says it all. I would sugget
a grass-roots organization called DAMM. By the way, I'd
like to know why DUI offenders are the only ones
required to drive with "Party Plates". Talk about
inequality! I'd love to see bankrobbers, arsonists,
rapists, etc. all have to have license plates indicating
what their crime is.
Posted by Jennifer at
2008-10-12 11:42
I was in an accident yesterday with a drunk driver, he
swerved out of his lane and into mine, almost hitting me
head on at about 60mph. Luckily I was able to swerve
right and avoid a head on collision, but he still hit
the right front fender and took the drivers side of my
car off. My injuries are minimal, but I cannot get the
vision of those headlights coming at me dead on out of
my head. All I thought at that moment is "This is how I
die"
It happens so fast, even when you are following all the rules, your life can be taken from you in a heartbeat. Now I am going to be scared everytime I get behind the wheel. But I am thankful to have not been severely injured and to still have my life. Thanks for listening.
Posted by chris colbert
at 2008-11-16 01:16
You must be a rookie driver. I can help you learn to
drive.
First, hang up the phone. When you get behind the wheel of an automobile, your activities are reduced to one; driving. Once you learn to concentrate, that's right, CONCENTRATE, on driving, you will become better at defensive driving. You will face constant and numerous hazards every time you take a drive. Including cars veering into your lane of travel. Your job when that happens is to make up for the offending driver's dangerous move with a counter move that reduces or eliminates the danger to you and that driver. Instead of swerving right, into the path of the oncoming vehicle, thereby causing damage to your right front fender, try STEERING left away from the danger, while lightly applying brakes to slow your speed. With enough experience, when faced with this sitiuation and others even more dangerous, your thoughts will become, hey did you see that idiot, he almost hit me, instead of " Oh My God! WE"RE ALL GONNA' DIE, BECAUSE THAT GUY DRANK BEER AND I SUCK AT DRIVING!"
Posted by chris colbert
at 2008-11-19 18:30
And your a big poopie head. But even poopie heads can
learn to drive defensively. It may save your life.
Posted by Alexis at
2008-12-05 09:01
Hi my name is Alexis and i am 15 years old. About 2
years ago my uncle lost his mother to a drunk driver,
and yet to this day the guy that killed her hasnt spend
one day in jail. I think drunk driving is not taken
seriously. And I think that all drunk drivers should get
life in prison and/or the death penalty. I have no
forgiveness for stupidity. Why should he get to run the
streets scott free, when my uncle has no mother now. She
was only about 50 years old and she left behind three
beautiful grand children that will never know their
grandmother. I wish i could so something to stop drunk
driving but i cant, so i think this group that you
organized is wonderful and i hope that one day i can
make a difference.
Posted by Shelly at
2008-12-05 09:08
The drunk driving poem
I went to a party, Mom, I remembered what you said. You told me not to drink, Mom, so I drank soda instead I really felt proud inside, Mom, the way you said I would. I didn't drink and drive, Mom, even though the others said I should. I know I did the right thing, Mom, I know you are always right. Now the party is finally ending Mom, as everyone is driving out of sight. As I got into my car, Mom, I knew I'd get home in one piece. Because of the way you raised me, so responsible and sweet. I started to drive away, Mom, but as I pulled out into the road, the other car didn't see me, Mom, and hit me like a load. As I lay there on the pavement, Mom, I hear the policeman say, the other guy is drunk, Mom, and now I'm the one who will pay. I'm lying here dying, Mom.. I wish you'd get here soon. How could this happen to me, Mom? My life just burst like a balloon. There is blood all around me, Mom, and most of it is mine. I hear the medic say, Mom, I'll die in a short time. I just wanted to tell you, Mom, I swear I didn't drink. It was the others, Mom. The others didn't think. He was probably at the same party as I. The only difference is, he drank and I will die. Why do people drink, Mom? It can ruin your whole life. I'm feeling sharp pains now. Pains just like a knife. The guy who hit me is walking, Mom, and I don't think it's fair. I'm lying here dying and all he can do is stare. Tell my brother not to cry, Mom. Tell Daddy to be brave. And when I go to heaven, Mom, put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave. Someone should have told him, Mom, not to drink and drive. If only they had told him, Mom, I would still be alive. My breath is getting shorter, Mom. I'm becoming very scared. Please don't cry for me, Mom. When I needed you, you were always there. I have one last question, Mom, before I say good bye. I didn't drink and drive, so why am I the one to die? IF THIS DOESNT CHANGE YOUR OPINION ON DRUNK DRIVING, I DONT KNOW WHAT WILL.
Posted by yoseph schennawy
at 2008-12-05 22:00
thank you for giving us yet another example of the level
of feminization we've come to in this country.we're
talking about a multidimensional problem that has its
social, political and financial impact on millions of
people on both sides and on our society as a whole and
the direction we're chosing for our future.you would
think that we might need a "Logical" and "scintific"
approach that involves collecting relevant facts which
can be turned into info which then can be carefully
studied and analyzed in order to produce solutions that
can be suggested to the decision makers!a strictly
professional process conducted by qualified unbiased non
"emotionally impaired" individuals and as far away as
possible from the zealots of the"special groups" and the
crooks of the state.but why do that if we can always
present the public with a poem?hey how about mom I'm
bleedig because the other driver was simply a
dumbass!mom I'm crippled because the other driver was a
senior citizen who can't see shit but he's still allowed
to drive a huge RV across the country because it's
"politically incorrect"to tell him he can't.mom I'm in a
comma because the other driver was eating,drinking
coffe,playing with the radio,messing with the navigator,
talking on the phone,looking at the map, horsing around
and porbably getting some head!mom I'm dead because the
other driver had an angry argument, hadn't slept for 2
days or simply was over exhausted and still got behind
the wheel!see there's a shit load of factors that could
impaire your driving ability and judgement and cause
accidents!this's where I see hypocracy in DUI laws!it's
a lot easier to turn the public against alcohol and
alcohol drinkers in such feminized society where the
majority have become willing to just take their pants
off and take it up their tailpipe at the mere mentioning
of words like
"victims", "mothers","children"and"safety"!great deal for the state and MADD,first:mislead the public on the issue, second:get their blind support and use it to criminalize them and third:simply eat their hard earned money under their watch!as for the problem that still exists and more importantly the future of freedom in this country,screw that,just show me the damn money!!
Posted by Shelly at
2008-12-09 08:41
No this poem had nothing to do with the amount of
feminization we have in our world today. It shows that
people care and how do we know that a woman wrote this
poem, it was a poem submitted by an unknown author. And
by posting a ignorant comment like this just shows that
you are probably just another drunk driver yourself. And
you have no common sense what so ever, and while you're
at it maybe you should go back to school and learn to
spell. I would like to see what you would do if you lost
someone that you love due to a drunk driver. Then let's
see who's talking.
Posted by yoseph schennawy
at 2008-12-09 22:18
thank you AGAIN for validating my point by posting a
typical
FEMINIZED "rabble rabble rabble"response!I don't know what education or knowledge you possess other than probably watching daytime rubbish tv shows to call me ignorant simply because I don't buy into misleading propagandas ,cheap sentements and not to mention DUMB and TALENTLESS poem!why don't you do us a favor and help yourself to a book or some news paper before you ask ME to go back to school?because then you would know that feminization has NOTHING to do with the author being a man or a woman or even a frog!you didn't have ANY valid logical argument other than pointing fingers and accusing me of being an"ignorant drunk driver"so what does that make you?for your info,I am educated,I am very well rounded,I'm not a"dunk" driver and I do have common sense!that same common sense demands that angry intolerant irrational narrow minded people should NOT shape our laws!those who lost loved ones have every right to be angry and they sure have the right to justice and restitution!however,they don't have the right to turn the issue into merely a SCAM to make money for the state and certain organizations at the expense of INNOCENT hard working fathers,mothers,brothers,sisters,sons and daughters while DIShonoring the memory of the actual victims of drunk driving and DMAGING freedom and civil liberties in our country!this is not just about drunk driving,this is about our general attitude towards solving issues,our way of life as a free country,our constitution and the future of democracy!
Posted by shrew at
2009-01-27 00:49
Ummm... didn't change my opinion, at all, just made me
agree with all the dui'ers. This is life, stuff happens,
period. if its not a drunk driver today, then it will be
something tomorrow. Yeah drinking and driving is bad,
but it this whole just plain "ban it!" attitude is crap
and will get nothing done. Keeping the drinking age so
high and being in such an ati-alcohol attitude to kids
will only make it worse, if I cannot get it, I really
want it, that is the way we are, human.
BTW: That poem is horrible, all it does is make young adults just want to get away from that crap... (who wants to be a mama's boy?)
Posted by bren at
2009-01-02 22:28
I agree/diagree with so much here. I believe dwi/dui is
all a money maker. Those who have money hire a lawyer go
thru the drill and get off. I am middle class but worry
about those that are not. Those men who are payint child
support and then can't b/c they have to pay dwi costs
even though they harmed no one. Plus the entrapment by
police officers. I have been pulled over twice, and no
wasn't doing antything wrong. I exited my vehicle
clumsily(sorry natural for me) so they quizzed me about
drinking alcohol w/not a drop in me. I had to explain to
the cop that my high beams were not on I was stopped at
a stop sign that sloped. NOW WHO'S THE IDIOT? MAYBE I
SHOULD HAVE ARRESTED HIM FOR STUPIDITY....
Posted by bus1 at
2009-01-19 21:27
im going to have to agree here...Stiffer penalties only
result in negative effects on society. DUI's are mainly
money generators for the government as well as
motivation for police incentives such as their fancy
Dodge CHARGER cop cars as well as faster promotion
through the ranks. Most of society is more negatively
affected by DUI convictions than positively affected. As
stated above even middleclass people struggle paying DUI
fines/attorneys as well as getting to work/school. This
is the class of people that the economy relies on, not
being able to get to work results in people not being
able to pay their bills, which is a major issue in
todays economy. Drunk driving is deffinetly wrong but
not everybody is drunk at the legal limit, so why should
these people be penalized as drunk driving offenders?
The most effective route in fixing the driving under the
influence problem is to use money from convictions to go
to public transportation. A neighbor in my area lost a
son to a drunk driving accident and now there is a fund
for free taxi rides from bars/restaurants/and parties to
your residence within 30 miles, this has to be one of
the most effective solutions to driving drunk. MADD
should focus on public transportation not people who
drive with alcohol on my breath.
Posted by Laurie Lewis
at 2009-01-21 01:09
Dear bus1, I read your letter and feel for your
neighbor. Please tell them that I send my heartfelt
feelings, as I too, have lost 2 men (fathers to my
children),to drunk driving accidents. I think that your
town is wonderful in fulfilling a greatly needed need.
The other day I was talking to a friend and she looked
into my eyes and said "If they just would've called a
cab Laurie, 5 of your 6 kids would'nt be fatherless". In
the town where I live, Roseburg, Oregon, there are so
many drunk driving incidents and arrests and when I read
your letter a little light bulb went off in my head and
I said to myself ...self.."what a great idea they came
up with!!!" My big brother works for a taxi cab company
here in our town, I will be talking to him and his
boss/company to see if we too can have the same response
as your town did!!!! Wish me luck and if it works I will
be in touch(if you don't mind) to let you know how it
all plays out. Peace harmony and love to you and your
town.... Laurie
Posted by bus1 at
2009-01-21 17:03
im sorry to hear that you have lost loves ones to DUI
incidents. Please be in touch if this works, I believe
this is one of the most effective way to preventing
drunk driving accidents and convictions. This fixes the
problem before it happens unlike post-incident
punishment. I live in Southern California and it is
definetely not a good option to even walk home. First of
all around here most cities are zones for serving
alcohol which are far away from residential areas.
Secondly Police will still arrest people and give them a
Drunk in public ticket, police arent promoting walking
home from bars/restaurants or parties. MADD should be
more worried about preventing people from driving while
drunk, not focus on the punishment. Simply taking the
thousands of dollars from DUI convictions should be
plenty of money to power complimentary taxi rides. In my
area they offer a ride up to 30 miles, for southern
california that is far, and should definetly be enough
to get somebody home. There are also options for those
who do not wish to leave their car away from home. Two
people come to pick people up the drunk person and one
of the taxi drivers drives their car home while the
drunk person and the other driver follow, there u will
have your car aswell as a safe ride home. But the matter
of the fact is the cost, shouldnt MADD sponsor programs
such as this? thanks!
Posted by Yoseph S. at
2009-01-21 22:00
I completely agree with both of you up there.one of the
KEY solutions to the problem is public transportation
and AFFORDABLE cab rides!most of those who drive under
the influence,do so because there are no public
transportation and they can't afford a cab.I live in
central california and YES bars and restaurants are
zoned faraway from residential areas.
the state is directing ALL the efforts and resources towards arresting, convicting and punishing people,taking the easy and more profitable way out,rather than CURING the problem and preserving lives and liberties. and from what I heard,MADD's spokesmen consistently show "indifferent" if not discouraging attitude towards this approach or ANY approach for that matter other than stiffer policies and penalties,which exposes them for what they really are,a special interest group that cares about nothing but capitalizing on our problems and sharing profits with the state. the free or nominal fee cab is a great idea!I saw how effective it was when I used to live in columbus Ga and I have no problem contributing to a similar project here in central california. in the mean time,I think we all have an obligation to pressure the state into picking up its REAL responsibilities by adopting similar ideas including improvement of the virtually NON EXISTENT public transportation rather than prosecuting everybody. I also believe that if MADD refuses "as expected" to contribute to such projects,then WE the citizens should subject them to MORE public scrutiny and should DEMAND a thorough audit to the organization and its individual executives.
Posted by Anthony Rhodes
at 2009-06-26 18:32
This is to all the people in the military who are under
21. I can understand why this comment by Lightner upsets
you. But the fact of the matter is that you don't need
this woman's approval to be respected. There is a good
chance that she has never had to see the things you've
seen. You have already proven yourselves worthy of a
glass of beer. Many people will over-simplify the duties
of soldier, marine, etc. There will be a day when she
has to answer for the things she says on this messed-up
Earth. As will I. I can imagine that losing a child in
such a tragic way can be crushing to a parent, but I'm
also against the use of scapegoats. Will this offend the
people on this site? Of course. But I am not sorry.
Posted by Mark at
2009-08-03 01:16
I lived in Germany for two and a half years in the Army.
They have crazy overzealous laws there. In some areas in
Germany you can lose your license for life after the
first one. I can understand it there. It makes sense.
There, there is about fifteen ways to get home that are
cheap other than driving.
In this country where Alcohol is part of our culture and in our media and movies, how can we criminalize people for doing what is legal and for some a way of life? Stopping on the way home and hearing about the happy hour at your favorite watering hole you should be able to stop in. Then, you are made a criminal for driving home. That is ridiculous not because I condone drinking in driving but, you can’t entice people to do something and make it criminal as long as you don’t get caught. This is supposed to be the land of the free. We are now becoming so over burdened with ridiculous laws; it might as well be communist Russia. Minorities and organizations are writing our laws and it helps the few and hurts the many. This is mainly because pockets are being lined to pass these ridiculous laws. The hypocritical aspect of that is most of the people who pass these laws do it themselves or make enough they can afford to take cabs home when public transportation isn’t available. This means drinking in public will only be reserved for the wealthy. The laws are being passed because the organizations are making money to push these laws. The law makers are making money off those organizations. The industries that cater to the laws are making a mint, for example, Lawyers, councilors, dui equipment manufacturers, etc. It should also be brought up that the states and local government are making a good part of their budgets from it. If people really wanted to stop DUI then there is only two ways. Prohibition, or come up with alternatives to DUI; An example of a DUI alternative is, a service like an idea I have for a DUI cab company that runs large passenger vans. You pay a once a month fee and you get twenty-four rides to a bar from home and back. You can also use it to a party or where ever you drink. It’s like DUI insurance. If you use the service and are at a bar you can grab it and bar hop for a real small free of like $5.00. You can take it home and get a ride back to your car the next day. This is reachable by most and you should save gas and your insurance company should lower your rates to belong to such a business. This is a cheap intelligent way to stop or lower the DUI rate…. I want to start the company but it takes too much capital. I hope someone runs with this idea. People could make millions and save millions of lives. I am on the border of losing, my house, my job, my car, and being on the street. This isn’t right. DUI laws are meant to punish not put people on the street and ruin lives. We can come up with better ways if we all put our heads together and want to solve problems and stop being hypocrites. Most people in our adult lives have gone to a wedding reception, bar, or party and had too much to drink. Just because you didn’t get caught doesn’t make you better than those who have. We all need to take responsibility and either fix this problem the right way or, stop it all together and go back to prohibition. We have to be real. If everyone in this country only drank enough not to get a DUI every bar in this country would close in a month. The alcohol companies would all close and millions of jobs would be lost. So let’s fix this the right way if we want to be realistic and live in the land of the free called America. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!! WE CAN DO BETTER!!!
Posted by Cleveland at
2009-08-06 05:09
2 Years ago I got my 3rd DUI. It took me 30 years to do
it. I never had an accident, hurt anyone or did any
property damage due to drinking and driving.
Why did I have to go to prison for 120 days? 4 months of my life in prison.(first time incarcerated) Don't even think of calling it jail. I was put into an environment of complete chaos for having a few beers. I was pulled over for doing 15 MPH over the speed limit on a turnpike in Connecticut.(it was midnight,so who else would be on the road except drunks and cops?)The state police were profiling. I was barely over the limit. I was 5 miles from home. Yes I broke the law. I AM STILL PAYING THE PRICE. The following was (is) my punishment. First of all, I called a New Haven lawyer... He told me not to waste my money because I was going to jail. I shrugged it off and thought "no way", boy was I wrong. Here is what happend. 1. One year loss of license. 2. 120 days in prison. 3. $1000.00 fine. 4. 200 hours of community service. 5. An "alcohol education program" (which I will comment on later) 6. An ignition interlock system (Breathalyzer) to be installed on my vehicle for 2 years after my license was reinstalled which I had to pay to have installed and calibrated periodically. WHAT? For speeding? Now I am a convicted felon. I used to do alot of contract work for United Technologies ( Pratt and Whitney, Sikorsky, Hamilton Sunstrand,etc.) as a computer tech. Everytime a recruiter hired me for defense plant work they would require a backgroung check. Now when my name is put into the Connecticut Judicial website my profile is listed as a covicted felon charged with driving under the influence of alcohol and or drugs. Drugs? Where did that come from? The court gave me my time in prison, fine and community service. Then DMV steps in. They took my license, made me put the interlock device on, and sent me to "alcohol education". Alcohol Education in Connecticut is run by The Commonwealth Group. A good name because they are getting very wealthy. It consists of a weekend retreat(Phase 1) to evaluate you, then 6 months of 2 AA meetings a week which has to be documented and 1 Commonwealth meeting a month (Phase 2) which was 60 miles away from my house. Then 1 meeting every 3 months for 1 year (Phase 3) Before you can get your license reinstated. These metting were all run by "counselors" who were all ex drug addicts or alcoholics. And these meetings were all "mandatory" unless it snowed or the classes got so big they told us we were exempt from the final meeting. Oh, it cost me $900.00 for this "education", which was basically a glorified AA meeting. So, did the punishment fit the crime? I live in a small shoreline town that goes through corrupt cops all the time. At one point they were running a prostitution ring at a school after hours and the chief of police was stealing money... he gets fired with 3 years pay! In the 70's when things were different We used to hang out in our muscle cars in town drinking and talking to cops at the same time. Drinking in public was legal then. If you were too buzzed, the cops would take your keys or give you a ride home. I guess my point is, If you kill or hurt someone in a car accident, it should be vehicular manslauter or assault. People SHOULD be punished for that. Police SHOULD NOT be out "hunting" every night to fill a quota. Especially since there in nobody to sniff out the skeletons in their closets. My life is ruined because I went to see a friend who happens to be a bartenter to loan him some money. Of course he gave me a few beers for helping him out. It was the first time I had been in a bar in over 3 years. These laws need some refinement. Right now it is all about the money. The fines, the money the state gets for every person in the over crowded jails, DMV gets thier share. Alcohol is LEGAL... RIGHT? Might as well close all of the bars and resturaunts next. As for all of you spelling bee champs out there, give Erica a break. There are typos all over the place here.
Posted by Rudy at
2009-08-12 22:33
I was stopped for a DUI did a blood test and spent a
night in jail. Luckily my case was dismissed because I
tested low even though I had drank earlier. I was not
impaired the whole time I drank, but could have failed a
DUI if I had left the establishment I was at a little
earlier than I did. This whole incident could have
easily ruined my life, as I am a teacher. I could have
lost my career (who would hire me with a criminal
record) my home, car and forced me to go bankrupt with
fines. I think of all of the lives that have been ruined
for nothing. I think that repeat offenders or people
with a high BAC while driving have a problem and should
be dealt with, but what about those who decided to drive
home before it got to late and where not impaired, but
did not meet the standards of a test. How many young
people have had their future obliterated? How many
families have been broken? For what, having a drink and
I'm not talking about drunk. Doesn't everyone make a
slight (very slight at times) lapse in judgement from
time to time.
Posted by Tony at
2009-10-07 04:16
Lots of good views here, even though some sound kind of
defensive, but that is the benefit of livig in a free
republic. So, I have a CDL and rarely drive commercial
vehicles, but because I want to keep the CDL I have to
be sure to never drink and drive, as I am illegal once I
pass .02(commercial license only), so to be sure I
always plan ahead and I got myself in the habit, which
is the hard part, by getting a ignition interlock put in
my car for 6 months and that was the best money ever
spent. This was my decision to control my circumstance.
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